This is why

Breaking News

There has been a shortge of basket balls at "Shit Leg Academy" when now know why.

Coach March says. " THAT DAMN BITCH! SHES ALWAYS TRYING TI REDUCE THE SIZE OF MY WAND SO THAT IT WILL FIT IN HER FUCK FORSAKEN BELLY BUTTON. SHE IS JUST ANOTHER HIV POSITIVE BIRD TRYING TO FLY THE COOP TO FAME, WELL LET ME TELL YOU. I AM GOING TO POP THOSE TITS THAT YOU HAD TO USE SOME BUTT SKIN ON BECAUSE MY ANUS WAS ENLARGED TO SHOW TEXTURE."

Later we varified that he was high.

MMM

Well, I would sleep with one eye open, before my anus bleeds!!

Time to get the Cran's

WO WO WO. I THINK ITS TIME TO GET THE CRAN'S

Happy Hump Day!

Don't Forget To Be Flirtatuos tomarrow on thursday!

Yeah, look at that sexy ladie! mmm----->

Anustual

Anustual (A-nus-chew-el) When an anus or bum comes in contact with gasoline or flamabl or cumbustual substances. eg, Sally Neuton sat on a gas tank wearing no underwear, all of a sudden little timmothy dropped a lit match on the tank and Sally's anus was severlly burned, it is now anustual, she currantly hast to poop through a tube that reduces from her back after eating various chilli's orspicey items.

Derived from Anus and combustual

SCRUTNEY!

Dearest Ray Anne from... springfeild!

Make yourself a blog! or the unkown gaga will destroy anything in its path to pluck any anal hairs from the bum of justin beiber!

Sincerely, Mr. Oldman

Poems

Over the next few weeks, were learning about poetry in English class. So me and My friend Aaron wrote some pretty fantastic poems for You.

Lady Gaga
Weird, Strange, Uterly dumb.
If you don't kill yourself, i'll cut off your bum.

Stray Dogs
Dirty, smelly, really quite strange.
You better watch out, you might get the mange!

Beyonce
Sing, Swing, i searched it on Bing.
Beyonce actually has a thing.

GINGER

Well here we are, at the back of a mall by the dumpsters. Hey look! Over there! Whos that over there being flirtatious with the garbage in that dumpster. Oh thats Ginger. Ginger what are you doing. Im Washing my hair. Ginger thats blue cheese dressing. Get out of my bathroom.

By the way, Aaron loves Pot Pies!!!

Teachers

Boy, Aaron and i have had some pretty silly teachers in our time. Like i remember this one in 6th grade. She was hilarious. One time we were taking a test, and she said that if anyone talks she's gonna kick them out in the hall. Well i sneezed, and Emily said God Bless you, which normally would have been the polite thing to do, but not in her class. The teacher stood up and shouted, "EMILY, GET OUT, GET OUT, OUT IN THE HALL!!!!!!!!" She was pretty sycotic. One minute she'd be talking to one of the class pets, and saying how pretty he was, and the next moment, "AAAGGGGHHH, BLA BLA BLA, GET OUT IN THE HALL. RA RA RA." So yeah it was a pretty fun class.
In a different class in 7th grade, we had this teacher that was even more sycvotic than her. Her favorite word was "BUMMER". If you did something wrong and she gave you an infraction, she would say "Well BUMMER," and then she would turn to the class and scream, FREEZE AND FACES," and would turn to Aaron and yell at him for tapping his pencil on his nose, and would say, "AARON, WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING, THIS ISN'T PLAYLAND. STOP THAT." So yeah... SHE WAS A CRAZY!!

This Is Why Chritina Agulara Has NOOO Friends

Yep, There are many programs for weight loss, but you probablly cant see those commercials pass the double deluxe burger that your rubbing on your FACE! THATS SLOPPY, YOUR SLOPPY BABIES, ITS JUST DISGRACEFUL.

Has anobady ever told you have a nice face?!? well there wrong! YOU FILTHY RAG!

My Ten Top Fave TV Shows

1. What I Like About You
2. The Nanny
3. The Amanda Show
4. Victorious
5.Sabrina, The Teenage Witch
6.The Old, All That
7. Sister, Siter
8. George Lopez
9. Glee
10. SNL (Saturday Night Live)

PS: Two of the WORST cartoons in history are

Recess (or as I call it RE-REcess)
and
Hey Arnold ( or as I call it Hey YouR Head Looks Like A Sideways Vagina, Arnald!)

Birth + Hospitals= Assassin Orangutan

You know those...what are they?...Oh, Ferternity wards? Is that it, well the place were people give birth. Anyway what is the point of those snuggies that look like they were made out of an old take out chinese food box, with all those unidentified stains, and the ties in the back butt old 4o year old women's butts hang out. Well let me tell ya, being a nurse or anyone who works in a hospital is not for me. If I saw someones butt hanging out i would say " Hey lady your butts hangin' out get that thing back inside ur stained rag, i don't care if you just sqeezed a watermelon out of ur...CheeChee, i don't wanna see that tatoo that used to be up on ur back know currently were ur butthole is, know lwtts get a move on, Sister!

Nursing Homes

Some people might think nursing homes are kinda wierd, and smelly, but there not. Well alright their smelly, actually quite smelly, but thats not the point. Nursing homes are quite funny. Old people are quite funny. One time i was at a nursing home, and there was this old guy, who we later fouind out was deaf. Anyways, my mom said hi to him and he didn't respond. after saying hi multiple times she assumed he was deaf and decided to wave at him. He didn't really understand that she was trying to say hi, so he shouted (because he was deaf), what do yah want. Then she wrote on a pice of paper goodbye, and he shouted "What are yah tryin to say." So we just walked away. And thats the story.

Terrible TV Shows!

There are some awfull TV shows out their. I dont know why they put such stupidity on television. Some of these awful TV shows are, Boy meets world, Fanboy and ChumChum, Yo Gabba Gabba, Cat dog, Rocket Power, Degrassi the next generation, kim possible, and many more!

I Have Alwaysed Wanted To Have My Own Toy Store

Wouldnt that be great! i would be the Willy Wonka of toyz!

The Aaron Show

I have been thinking alot about The Aaron show! I want to have a show thats like a spin off of the amanda show with all knew skits, sketches, and shorts. It would awesome!

Nonsence I have never eaten a flyswater

really? This is absurd.

My Finger

Today I cut my finger trying to cut up a box with scissors. Like three ours later it started throbbing erratically. oh nelly what am i to do with my life :)